The beginner's guide to Bravo

Terri is back, y’all! She sent all of the below info to me in a Google Doc several months ago, and has now generously agreed to share it here. My girlfriend and I took Terri’s advice and started with Real Housewives of Potomac, which is great; the women are very funny and their lives are fairly interesting (especially compared to, say, the women on Beverly Hills), and the show is well-produced and well-edited. Now that we’re caught up on RHOP, we’ve moved onto RHONY, and I find myself saying, “What…is…Ramona Singer’s…DEAL???” at least once a day. I’m loving it! Anyway, with everything going on in the world right now, I gotta say… watching Bravo (and discussing the shows at length with my gf/talking about all of this with our friends) has been helping. —Rachel

There are some cultural institutions so deeply embedded into my brain and psyche that I reference or quote them daily, often without realizing — Seinfeld, Airplane!, Drop Dead Gorgeous, and, of course, the Bravo television universe. I started watching The Real Housewives of Orange County back in 2007, and have missed very few episodes of any franchise since. Sometimes, it feels like Bravo is the only TV I watch, so much so that I (unsuccessfully) tried to argue to a Spectrum cable representative that I should only have to pay for one channel as part of my cable package. Alas.

I know there’s a lot of good TV out there, but even before 2020, all I really wanted to watch was people quibbling over a stolen dress from a talk show or whether it’s OK to get a boob job from a “vagina doctor.” My deep, abiding love for the Real Housewives and their kin is such that when I started at BuzzFeed back in 2015 and was worried I wouldn’t make any coworker friends, someone told me, “Just find someone who watches Bravo and you’ll be friends.” And, reader, she was right!

Since the pandemic started, many of my friends have begun watching Bravo out of a need for addictive, low-stakes TV shows that come in mass quantities. And let me tell you, it has been thrilling to make recommendations and welcome people into the world of Bethenny Frankel and Captain Lee that I have largely lived in alone, save for my mom and sisters and some select pals. So I decided to package up those recs into a Bravo beginner viewer’s guide. Like many things, my rankings and recs are subject to change, but I feel pretty confident guiding you into the Bravoverse via this list.

Top-tier shows

Below Deck S3–present

Below Deck is my favorite, and arguably the best, show on Bravo right now. It’s like Real World, in that a group of 20/30 somethings work together and hook up a bunch, but THEN there’s a Downton Abbey upstairs/downstairs vibe going on because there are super rich people that rent the yacht they’re on, and they usually have their own drama going on. The cast changes up every season, which gives it good variety, but it’s consistently good during these seasons. Keep a special eye out for Rocky, Kyle, and of course, Kate. And Captain Lee, obviously.

Below Deck Mediterranean S2–present

Below Deck Med is basically as good as regular Below Deck, even though I personally dislike Hannah, the chief stew. But! This spinoff has Captain Sandy, a queer female yacht captain! And Season 2 is just absolutely non-stop with the drama. There was one episode I will truly never forget watching in real-time, that’s how entertaining it was.

Top Chef

A truly great reality competition show! There are a lot of seasons, so if you want specific recs, my personal favorites are S2, S6, and S17 (the most recent one, which was amazing but also an all-stars one, so you might not know a lot of the people if you’ve never watched before). I especially enjoy going to the restaurants of contestants, they’ve all been notably delicious.

Summer House

Terrible New Yorkers who rent a Hamptons house together. IDK why I’ve been captivated from the beginning, but it truly gets better every episode for me. No need to make it a priority, but I wanted to throw it in here. I think all seasons have been p entertaining, but it got especially good in S3, after a bunch of people got fired.

Southern Charm S1–S5

These first seasons are high-key art, and include, but aren’t limited to: people with exorbitant amounts of old money, a “hilbilly femme fatale,” a surprise lovechild, a no-nonsense older broad who wears caftans and has a butler… the list goes on. TW: sexual assault (off-camera, but Thomas Ravenel, a main character who has since left the show and been completely denounced, is awful), gaslighting, and a lot of plantations/glorification of the South. I don’t plan to watch the new season because 1) these people are racists, and 2) the most recent season was boring/trash. But if you can put aside how awful 95% of the cast is, watch it, it’s really entertaining.

Vanderpump Rules S1–6

Truly Shakespearean. It started as a Real Housewives of Beverly Hills spinoff, but it immediately found its legs as something entirely its own. Everyone on it is purely terrible (depraved from the beginning, but many on the cast have been revealed to be pretty awful and racist recently, so….). There is cheating, cheating with best friends, face-slapping, name-calling, and quite possibly some of the least self-aware people you’ll ever witness. It’s soapy and trashy, and just like… classic reality TV, if that’s what you want right now.

Shahs of Sunset

IDK y’all, it’s pretty problematic at times, especially recently, but the cast has truly been best friends for decades, which gives it a sense of history I really appreciate.

Now, you may notice—and be surprised by—the lack of Housewives in this must-watch/top-tier section. This is not an accident. Though they’re viewed as signature Bravo properties, they are a massive time commitment, more niche, and IMO, much more inconsistent. The shows listed here have a much lower barrier of entry and feel much more fresh, at least to me. There are Housewives seasons listed below though, if you’re interested!!

If you want Real Housewives

(Ed. note: you do!!!!)

Real Housewives of New York S3–present

There is not a bad season (or episode) in the bunch, but the action really starts in Season 3. There are fights, sure, but these women are friends and have some fun and ridiculous moments together, and some have been on for the full 12 years, so there’s some delightful character development (or deterioration) and continuity. If you’ve ever wondered how Bethenny Frankel got to be the way she is, heard of someone refer to “Scary Island,” or wondered why someone would jog IN TRAFFIC on Fifth Avenue, buckle up. Note that S3 might be a bit of a slow burn; there was a big casting upheaval after that one (for the better), and things get much more loose and fun going forward. But I think S3 is critical viewing for comparison and to get to see Bethenny before she struck out on her own.

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills S1

It’s my humble (and correct) opinion that the first season was the only good one of this franchise. Content note: suicide (one of the main character’s husbands killed himself right after the season aired, probably due to what was revealed about him as a result of being on the show, which makes it a really tough rewatch). You could also tack on S2 and S3, but only if you really like S1. The other seasons really aren’t worth it. I promise.

Real Housewives of New Jersey S1–2

Confession: RHONJ has never been my favorite (too many family members fighting with each other), but S1 has a true villain in Danielle Staub, and the absolutely iconic table-flipping moment. If you want to hear someone yell “Engaged 19 times?! Prostitution whore!” then by all means, check this out.

Real Housewives of Atlanta (any season)

RHOA is a good grab ‘n go franchise; it has its ups and downs, but it’s overall pretty entertaining, with highly memorable one-liners (“Who’s gonna check me, boo?”), some great drama (a brawl at a sexy lingerie party!), and some singular stars. Any season with Phaedra is a wild one, and if you like these women (they’re a blast to watch), then jump in wherever and enjoy the ride.

Real Housewives of Potomac S2–present

I was initially attracted to this franchise because I grew up in the area, but it really picked up during S2. Some wild allegations are thrown around, and the cast has a really good dynamic now. In fact, since I first created this doc, I would elevate the entire franchise to the highest tier of housewives. The women really show their lives, get into detail with each other, and still manage to bring the entertainment. (There is literally a parrot named T’Challa on the most recent season, and his contributions to the episodes cannot be understated.) If you watch, feel free to skip S1 (and go back to watch it to compare once you’re finished with your binge).

Honorable mentions

Million Dollar Listing: LA and New York

I like both cities equally. In LA, you get campy Josh Flagg (and in earlier seasons, his wonderful grandma), Josh Altman (blech) and Heather’s romance, giant LA estates, some celeb cameos, and some real cutthroat competition. In New York, you get my love Ryan Serhant, kooky Fredrik Eklund, a peek into some wildly overpriced New York City apartments, and also some cutthroat competition. It’s as much about their interpersonal and personal dramas as it is about real estate, and I love it! You could start from the beginning—I actually don’t think I ever watched the first few seasons of either franchise, so it doesn’t matter—or you can jump in around S3/S4 and still enjoy it.

Family Karma

This is the newest of the bunch; there’s only been one season and it aired this spring. I loved it! It follows a bunch of 20- and 30- something Indian Americans living in Florida AND their parents, and the parents have maybe even better drama than their kids. I really really hope they’re able to film another season, I am invested in these people.

Real Housewives of Melbourne

IMPOSSIBLE TO FIND!!! But if you can, watch it. I’ve only been able to see the first 3–4 seasons and was obsessed, but then they stopped airing it in the US and I’ve been sad ever since.

Real Housewives of Dallas

They’re racist, Trump-supporting assholes, but there were some real unhinged highlights in S2 and S3, if you can stomach it.

Bonus: Canceled Shows I Love

• Bethenny Getting Married/Ever After

• Ladies of London

• NYC Prep

• Millionaire Matchmaker

• Old seasons of Project Runway, pre-move to Lifetime (it’s been meh ever since it came back to Bravo)

• ***my mom dearly misses Princesses: Long Island, but I never watched it. Threw it in here anyway since she’s a real Bravo fan. 📺

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Extremely good shit: IKEA Fado lamp

IKEA Lisabo side table, Mimi Ceramics planter, Poketo coaster

As the days get shorter and we prepare for a long winter at home, I’m getting very into lighting! I come to you with two strong recs in this department: unscented taper candles, and, today, the $25 IKEA Fado lamp.

I cannot say enough good things about this lamp, which my girlfriend brought into my life last year. It looks so nice and creates a soft, glowy, warm, cozy light. It also really pulls its weight, brightening up dark spaces without being too harsh.

It was actually impossible to get the Fado in Brooklyn for a while this spring/summer, but I kept checking the website regularly and they eventually returned — so we were able to buy two more, bringing our total to four (two in the living room, two in the bedroom). Other friends have mentioned the same thing happening in other cities recently, but they were also able to get them eventually, so don’t give up if it appears to be out of stock where you live.

The Fado comes with a perfectly good bulb, but if you want to take it to the next level, I recommend the Yeelight multicolor smart LED bulb ($32.99 on Amazon). We have two of these, and have been really happy with them. You can use the app that goes with it to choose the exact shade of white and brightness you want, and/or easily turn the bulb whatever color you want. (My friend Devin sold me on this idea, and now I’m very into it, especially for movie nights. I recommend a pink shade, personally.)

Other lighting-related odds and ends:

• While poking around Tradera (a Swedish version of eBay) this summer, my gf came across the IKEA Lykta lamp, which they no longer produce. It originally came in a bunch of colors; we tracked down a Barbie–fuchsia one on eBay, and absolutely love it. While the color is fairly aggro, it’s balanced by the fact that the lamp is so small. And when it’s on, it looks very much like the wax in a lava lamp, mid-bloop. It’s very flirty!!!

• The Room Essentials G40 clear globes from Target ($12 for a 20-ct. string) are my all-time favorite indoor/outdoor string lights.

• Good floor lamps are hard to find, but Article now has an orb floor lamp (floorb?) that looks pretty nice.

• I’m into IKEA's $12 Tokabo table lamp, which seems like it might be the new Lykta. The lamp’s designer said, “I see TOKABO table lamp as a cute little friend who fits anywhere, on the smallest shelf or table top.” A cute little friend!!! I love it. 💡

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I've finally achieved my lifelong dream of owning a postal scale

Since everyone is—reasonably, correctly!—talking about the post office right now (and buying lots of stamps), it seems like a good time to mention a recentish purchase of mine that has been very wonderful: my USPS postal scale.

I have wanted a postal scale basically since I’ve known what they are, but have never had a super compelling reason to get one. But a couple months ago — wanting/needing to send small packages but not willing to go inside a closet-sized UPS store to do so — I decided to buy one. And let me tell you, it’s been worth its weight in gold.

Basically, a postal scale allows you to precisely calculate the weight of a package, so you can then create a shipping label from home. (This postal scale can connect to your computer/the USPS website via USB, but that feature only works with PCs. Fortunately, that’s not actually necessary — you can simply type the weight in on the USPS website when you’re preparing the label.)

It’s been really helpful to have the scale in a few instances where I’ve needed to make a return and the company doesn’t cover return shipping/provide a label; without it, I would be sort of screwed. It also allows the possibility of sending out care packages and gifts!

To make the postal scale work, you’ll also need access to a printer for the labels you’re creating, which I feel like might actually be the higher barrier to entry…but I got a printer this summer too, and can say that having both in my home has made me feel very powerful! Not having a working printer is a hassle fairly regularly, so having one has been a true relief, and made it easier to stay at home/inside.

Buy it from USPS for $35.99. 📫

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I would lay down my life for this Hobonichi Techo planner

I’d been thinking about buying a Hobonichi Techo Cousin planner ($35.04) for two years, so I finally decided to go for it this fall. It’s just such a good planner, and after four years of dot journaling in a Leuchtturm notebook, I’m ready for a little change! I ordered my Hobonichi Techo Cousin back in October, and I’m legitimately looking forward to January 1 so I can start using it.

Here’s the deal with the Hobonichi Techo, from the website:

The Hobonichi Techo is a planner notebook created by staff members of the website Hobo Nikkan Itoi Shinbun, shortened as Hobonichi. Techo (pronounced “tetch-oh”) is a Japanese word for a planner notebook. We also describe the Hobonichi Techo as a Life Book; it demonstrates the planner notebook’s versatility and freedom that accommodates every user’s unique personality and lifestyle. It first came out as a 2002 edition, which was created when the members — who weren’t professional planner designers — decided to get together and create a brand new kind of planner that they would actually want to use themselves. There are 18 years of history behind the current book. New varieties have appeared over the years in response to customer requests, and all the techos improve every year based on these requests and feedback. New cover designs are released every year so that using a Hobonichi Techo carries an extra sense of excitement and enjoyment. In recent years people from all over the world have begun to use the techo — there are now over 780,000 users worldwide!

I was able to look at several different Hobonichi Techo planners back in late 2017, and the Cousin was my personal favorite. (It was also my favorite of all of the planners I looked at in 2017, and I looked at…a fuckton of planners that year.) It’s more guided than a dot journal — but not annoyingly so — and really nails both form and function.

I highly recommend going to the Cousin’s About section and clicking through all of the different tabs to see/read about the features, because there are a lot of them! But here are some of the things I like about it, if you’re curious…

Size

The Cousin (the A5) is the biggest of all of the Techo planners, but isn’t huge…it’s 5.8” x 8.3”, so it’s fairly close in size to the Leuchtturm I’ve been using for years. It is the perfect size for me.

If you want a smaller planner, the original Hobonichi Techo (A6) ($20.02) is also good. (You can also buy the original on Amazon.) I actually bought the original by accident because I got confused when I was placing my order. (One way to remember which one is which: the Cousin is the big one, much like Cousin Greg is the big one on Succession.) While the original is perfectly nice (and my girlfriend is happy to take it off my hands), I prefer one with more room to write on each day, aka the Cousin.

The paper

Ugh, this notebook. I just love it! The paper is super thin and smooth and feels so luxurious. The journal also has layflat binding (which means it will easily lay open/flat on your desk).

Image: Hobonichi Techo

The cream-colored cover is lovely, and even though it’s super lightweight, it’s surprisingly durable. (I tried bending the corners of the sample one I received, and couldn’t.) You can also buy a cover for it, but I didn’t go that route; instead, I bought a mesh pouch at McNally Jackson to transport it in.

There are different colors of ink used throughout the journal (the daily pages for each month are printed in a different color, for example) but the colors still feel fairly neutral. Also, a lot of the grids and other details are designed to be guidelines that you can only see up close (similar to the dots in a dot grid journal), so those are printed in a fairly light ink.

The page design

So, the big difference between this planner and the dot journaling method is that the Cousin is pre-printed. So, the pages come with dates and other information already on them, and each day gets its own page. There is also a year-at-glance view, monthly calendar pages, a spot for goals/tasks each month, weekly pages (with an hourly breakdown that I like a lot), and then the daily pages. This isn’t ideal if you want to be able to write really long journal entries some days, or to add in a new spread about, say, your favorite books wherever you feel like it. But it’s great if you want something convenient that is kind of doing the work for you, and/or you don’t mind when your journal or planner bosses you around a little bit.

I tend to be way too picky to enjoy pre-designed daily pages, but in this case, they are designed so well and so thoughtfully that I really like them. There’s an hourly breakdown on the left side of the page if you want to use it (but that’s easy to ignore), and then there is space on the right where you can list tasks/to-dos. (There is also a light “invisible line” down the middle that you can use to separate the two if you want to.) And there is space at the bottom for journaling/notes. You can also use the daily pages as a sketchbook or regular journal…like, you can just kind of easily write or doodle over the printed page designs if you want.

Features

The Cousin has several thoughtful/cute touches throughout that I love, including the moon phase on each daily page; subtle color tabs for each month of the year; a mini monthly calendar every two pages; and a “warm up page” at the beginning where you can reflect on the past year/set the tone of the new year. In the back of the notebook, there is blank graph paper; a “Favorites” page where you can document your favorite songs, movies, books, purchases, etc.; and a “My 100” page that you can use for anything you want (wins, top moments, goals, favorites, etc.).

Another thing people seem to love about these planners is that they have a quote on each page. This is actually not my thing, but it’s sort of moot because in the Cousin, all the quotes are in Japanese, so I can’t read them.

Shopping

I will say that the Hobonichi Techo website is a tad hard to navigate, in part because there some choices to be made: you have to figure out which planner you want, and whether you’d like the week starts to start on Sunday or Monday. You can also buy the Cousin Avec, where you get two notebooks that each last six months instead of one notebook for the whole year. And if you want to pick out a cover, there are a lot of options.

Once you make your selection, you’ll get routed to a different interface to purchase, and you’ll have to make sure it’s all in USD. It’s also not the most user friendly, but it’s also not prohibitively difficult to use. And both notebooks I ordered arrived very quickly (especially considering that they were shipping from Japan).

TL;DR: The Hobonichi Techo Cousin planner is super elegant and well-designed, and I am very excited to start using mine in January! Buy the 2020 Cousin for $35.04. 🗓

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