If you can’t handle me at my Crocs, you don’t deserve me at my literally any other shoe

I am a proud member of Team Take Off Your Shoes at the Door, which means I’m extremely pro house shoes. And the time has come for me to admit that my current house shoes of choice are the highly controversial Crocs. 

I was introduced to Crocs at the age of 19 by my friend Beth. I was visiting her in Chicago and she was wearing a kelly green pair around the city. Her explanation: “Flip-flops are disgusting, especially in a city, but Crocs are great.” This is actually 100% true and correct, but it didn’t take long for me to fall out of love with the hot pink pair I bought. After that, I didn’t really think much about Crocs again.  

But then last fall, I came across some pale blue faux shearling–lined Crocs on Zappos and….……..did not hate them. They looked really cozy and weren’t very expensive, so I decided to go for it. After wearing them indoors for just a few weeks, I knew I had made the right decision, so I asked for a second pair (to wear outside) for Christmas, which my mom ended up giving me.

Feeling quite secure in my Crocs-related life choices, I also recently got two non-lined pairs: the chambray blue classics (I fully intended to buy the mint green and then just like….didn’t??? IDK?) which are for outside, and a pair of pink “freesail” Crocs that are way lower profile/lighter weight for inside.

I did not mean to make a pair of Crocs that looked like my blog; it just sort of happened.

Are Crocs ugly? I mean…I don’t think of Crocs as ugly as much as I think of them as being for children. I can’t say that I think Crocs are particularly defensible from an aesthetic POV. Though a lot of cool people and celebrities wear Crocs, and the brand manages to make them look pretty cute on Instagram, I’m not going to sit here and pretend that it looks hip or stylish when I wear them. I don’t think they look awful on me — choosing the right color goes a long way in this regard — but they also don’t look good either, you know? The vibe, on me anyway, is, I think, fairly neutral — i.e., a vaguely shoe-shaped swath of color, similar to what a cartoon or video game character might wear. 

But also….IDGAF if they are cute or cool!!! You know what’s not cute? Getting a sore back from a couple hours of meal prep because you’re in your thirties now!!! My friend Augusta (who recently bought a very cute lavender pair of Crocs) wrote an ode to wearing comfortable shoes that I think about a lot, and that is very relevant here. 

If it’s not already obvious, Crocs are kind of the ideal pandemic footwear. They are great for long periods of cooking, doing lots of water chores, etc. They can be cleaned and disinfected easily. They can be worn with or without socks and look correct with soft clothes. They slip on and off easily, which is great when you’ve just come inside after taking your dog out and need to wash your hands before you do anything else. They are also very clearly made for carers; when I think of Crocs, I think of healthcare workers and chefs, two tasks that are fundamentally about nurturing. So wearing Crocs right now feels appropriate and correct.

By the way, when I told my mom I was writing this blog post, she told me I had to interview her for it. This is fair; my mother is basically a sneakerhead…but for Crocs. She was into Crocs before Post Malone or Madewell were. She has 20 pairs and counting (!!), and and her collection includes some limited editions. 

“The reason I only like to wear Crocs is because every other shoe I have tried is not as comfortable,” she told me. “I have advanced osteoarthritis in both knees and these are the only shoes that provide the comfort I need for being on my feet all day as an art teacher. The kids at school love them.” 

Some of my mom’s favorite pairs, in her own words: turquoise with SpongeBob jibbetz (the little decorative charms); donut print; black with PacMan jibbetz; pink floral; green with working Christmas light trim; tie-dye; and Star Wars. She also has “dress” Crocs that have leather uppers.

My mom also sent me a screenshot of a message from a parent, who said her daughter (so, my mom’s student) wanted “Crocs with paint splotches on them” for her birthday because she said “her favorite teacher (you) would love them.” The parent went on: “She specifically requested these because she loves that you wear Crocs all the time and she couldn’t wait to show you!” 

In other family clog news, my girlfriend bought a pair of white Dansko clogs a couple of months ago that look great on her. Danskos are a whole other ugly cool shoe story, but I like my gfs so much (way more than I expected to). I might get a pair eventually, but I do think Danskos make more sense as real world shoes vs. house shoes. 

A few odds and ends:

• Here is a good podcast episode about the rise, fall, and re-rise of Crocs.

• I bought Teva Hurricane Drift sandals last summer and love them. 

• I still freaking love these Italian clogs. 

• The essay about fanny packs that I wrote a few years ago feels relevant to this discussion. ✨

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cozy :) house :) shoes :)

If you want to feel extra cozy when tooling around town or doing chores at home, might I suggest these cozy shearling slip-ons? They are vegan, come in black shearling, and cost $12.50 at Wal-mart (on sale from $35).

I feel like they’re good for anyone who loves Jenni Kayne but doesn’t have Jenni Kayne money.

@nickisebastian via @jennikayne

@nickisebastian via @jennikayne

@laylaygibson via @jennikayne

Speaking of my clog wishlist, I’m very into these muted Birks, and I love these Calzuro clogs for summer! (While this look isn’t my personal style, it’s very cute.) ☁️

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I’m currently very into Tessa clogs

Earlier this summer, I spent a not-small amount of time looking for the perfect clogs. I still like/wear the pair of Hasbeens I bought on sale last summer, but I was on the hunt for a slip-on clog with a slightly lower heel and minimal hardware in a neutral color that was not black. My girlfriend also wanted a pair of clogs (she had slightly different — but no less fussy — requirements), and, well, the next thing I knew, I was 75 tabs deep in clog round-ups/options!

I like clogs for a lot of reasons. Similar to a jumpsuit, clogs make you look put-together while also being very easy/comfortable. I bought my Hasbeens because I wanted a comfortable closed-toe summer shoe, but I also appreciate that you can add socks and wear them in colder months. I’ve also been slowly phasing out my skinny jeans, and clogs are a good shoe for straighter/wider leg pants. And if you, like me, prefer to be this person instead of tying/untying your shoes, well…clogs are great in that regard, too!

During my search, I looked at No. 06, Bryr, Rachel Comey (which is the brand Aidy Bryant wore on Shrill), Charlotte Stone, Beklina, Hasbeens, Sandgrens, Lotta from Stockholm, and Madewell. While I found some good contenders, nothing was quite it. I loved the No. 06 in clover green for fall and the Bryr in Pacific gray and natural, but I really balked at the price.

Then, deep in my twentieth Strategist article, I came across a single link to Tessa Clogs. The Tessa website is A Lot, but the plain traditional heel ($84.95 + ~$15 shipping) is a good place to start — that’s actually what my girlfriend and I both ended up buying. I went with the denim blue, which reads as sort of a soft black/grayish navy in person, and she got the black, which is classic and lovely IRL.

Even though I wish Tessa had the color offering of No. 06 or Bryr, I love that the plain low heel clogs are super customizable (and are considerably less expensive than the other brands). You can choose from three sole colors and order them with or without a strap/snap, and with or without an edge band. (For reference, these clogs have a raw edge; mine don’t — they have an edge band.)

The website isn’t the easiest to navigate, but they have very good/responsive customer service. I emailed them to ask a bunch of questions, and they were great. They mailed me a (clog-shaped!!) swatch so I could be 100% sure on the color before I ordered, which was super helpful. My girlfriend’s clogs turned out to be a little too roomy across the top of her foot (i.e., they fit length-wise, but they weren’t snug enough to stay on her foot) and they let her ship them back so they could adjust the fit.

Anyway, if you’re in the market for clogs, Tessa clogs are very good! I like mine a lot and will probably buy another pair at some point soon.

Further clog-related reading:

• The Life-Changing Magic of Clogs, The New Yorker.

• In Praise of an Aggressively Unfashionable Shoe, The New York Times.

• The New Mom Uniform of Park Slope, The New York Times.

• Also, while working on this post, I fell down an ABBA rabbit hole because I was trying to find something to back up the claim that ABBA popularized clogs in the US in the ‘70s. I couldn’t find that, but I did find an article that says that ABBA’s costumes were designed to help them avoid paying taxes!

• Why is No. 06 stepping on my neck like this??? ✨

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